Quotes by Scott Adams

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.

— Scott Adams

Life

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

The best plan now is to have as many bosses as possible. I call it boss diversity. If you work for a company and you have one boss and that boss doesn't like you or wants to get rid of you, you're in trouble. But if you work for yourself, you have lots of bosses, who are your customers, and if a few of them decide they don't like you, that's okay.

— Scott Adams

Success

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel.

— Scott Adams

Success

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.

— Scott Adams

Life

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

You don't argue with a four-year old about why he shouldn't eat candy for dinner. You don't punch a mentally handicapped guy even if he punches you first. And you don't argue when a women tells you she's only making 80 cents to your dollar. It's the path of least resistance. You save your energy for more important battles.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

I've always defined myself not as a cartoonist , but as an entrepreneur. That was true before I tried cartooning. I always imagined cartooning would be how I got my seed capital. I always thought my other businesses would be the less dominant part of my life.

— Scott Adams

Life

The best things in life are silly.

— Scott Adams

Life

I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom

I'm not happy on vacation. In those rare times when I have three hours with no work I have to do, I'm terribly uncomfortable.

— Scott Adams

Success

If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

— Scott Adams

Wisdom