Quotes by Albert Ellis

The art of love is largely the art of persistence.

— Albert Ellis

Love

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.

— Albert Ellis

Life

Acceptance is not love. You love a person because he or she has lovable traits, but you accept everybody just because they're alive and human.

— Albert Ellis

Love

There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy.

— Albert Ellis

Life

People got insights into what was bothering them, but they hardly did a damn thing to change.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

There's no evidence whatsoever that men are more rational than women. Both sexes seem to be equally irrational.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

People could rationally decide that prolonged relationships take up too much time and effort and that they'd much rather do other kinds of things. But most people are afraid of rejection.

— Albert Ellis

Success

We teach people that they upset themselves. We can't change the past, so we change how people are thinking, feeling and behaving today.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

By not caring too much about what people think, I'm able to think for myself and propagate ideas which are very often unpopular. And I succeed.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it's conditional.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

I think the future of psychotherapy and psychology is in the school system. We need to teach every child how to rarely seriously disturb himself or herself and how to overcome disturbance when it occurs.

— Albert Ellis

Hope

You largely constructed your depression. It wasn't given to you. Therefore, you can deconstruct it.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

People don't just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

In the old days we used to get more referrals, because people had insurance that paid for therapy. Now they belong to HMOs, and we can only be affiliated with a few HMOs.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

I get people to truly accept themselves unconditionally, whether or not their therapist or anyone loves them.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

If something is irrational, that means it won't work. It's usually unrealistic.

— Albert Ellis

Success

For that again, is what all manner of religion essentially is: childish dependency.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

I would have liked having children to some degree, but frankly I haven't got the time to take the kids to the goddamn ballgame.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

I think it's unfair, but they have the right as fallible, screwed-up humans to be unfair; that's the human condition.

— Albert Ellis

Life

Rational beliefs bring us closer to getting good results in the real world.

— Albert Ellis

Life

Most people would have given up when faced with all the criticism I've received over the years.

— Albert Ellis

Wisdom

I'm very happy. I like my work and the various aspects of it - going around the world, teaching the gospel according to St. Albert.

— Albert Ellis

Success

I had a great many sex and love cases where people were absolutely devastated when somebody with whom they were compulsively in love didn't love them back. They were killing themselves with anxiety and depression.

— Albert Ellis

Love